The Strength of Women

March 3, 2015

 

In between the sleepless nights and teething and wondering how Alice got such a small amount of sweetcorn in that many places (mind blowing, really), I find myself daydreaming about who Alice will be when she grows up. Not so much what she will do for a living, but how she will treat people, where she will find peace and happiness, how she will handle herself in times of doubt or stress. It’s daunting, knowing that I have such a big influence on these outcomes for her. The values and ideals that Alice experiences now will set the tone for the rest of her life, and that is a very humbling thought.

Being a teacher I am no stranger to philosophies and mission statements, but I never thought I would feel the urge to develop a philosophy of raising a daughter. There are things I want Alice to know, to believe, for when she is older and needs to look inside herself for guidance. Things like empathy, and gentleness, and cultivating the ability to see beauty all around her. And I want her to believe wholeheartedly that she has strength.
The following is today’s email to Alice, and the first overt lesson in what the strength of a woman is all about.
 
So, Babygirl, yesterday was a pretty big day for me, and I kind of have you to thank! Yesterday I cut off most of my hair and donated it to be made in to a wig for people who have cancer. I took you, too, and you chatted to people at the gym and played with the swiss balls while I talked to the people from the newspaper and had my pony tails cut off. Our friends and family also donated $1000 to the cancer society which helps cancer patients and their families in lots of ways.

Here's why I have you to thank. The first reason is because, when I was pregnant with you, you made my hair grow long and strong and it hasn't stopped since. Because of you I don't have time to wash my hair as often as I used to, and that means it's super healthy. I think this is an example of how having children changes your life in every way possible, even down to how a mother looks after her hair. Luckily I wouldn't have it any other way!

The second reason I have you to thank for yesterday is because you - sweet little
unassuming you - have taught me all about the strength of women. Girls are powerful. I hope you know that, and if not, I'm telling you now. From the day I found out about you I have been learning about the strength of women. Women have babies, we fight history and make the world our oyster, and the truly powerful women use that strength to build up others. Truly powerful women know that strength is within themselves, and they don't need to bring down anyone else - man or woman - to express their power. And the amazing thing is that women do all this with their finger on the pulse of their emotions and an eye on the greater good.

YOU have taught me that I am capable of this, too. I might be tired or hangry or maybe even a bit frightened, but you have shown me that, with a deep breath and a plan, I can overcome everything. I hope with all my heart that you know you are capable of this, too.

So, yesterday was about celebrating this strength. The gym we were at is all about the strength of woman, and so is the Roller Derby team that the money is going to the cancer society through (Just quietly, if you ever get involved in this sport I'd be so happy! Those girls are the epitome of tough and they treat each other like family!).

And of course, the hair is all about strength, too. A woman with cancer might be using all that strength inside her just to fight it, to keep her family together, to remain positive. We can get more strength though - maybe from reading or dancing or the love of our family or eating a piece of chocolate. Well, little pudding, strength can also come from a good hair day. So you have helped me share my strength with another woman who is already using up every ounce of hers. Thank you, baby girl.

I hope you don't mind me sharing a little bit of this email - Can you imagine how wonderful it would be if the lesson you have taught me could help others, too? Strength is a bit like love, after all; share it with others and it grows.

We are going to have a wonderful day today!
Lots of love, Mumma

Even when I do something that has nothing to do with her it's still, in some ways, all about Alice.